What are the customs and traditions at the Russian wedding. Wedding traditions in russia and other countries

For a long time, it is the wedding that has been considered the most important event in life. Our ancestors started a family, adhering to traditions and strictly observing special rules. Echoes of the wedding ritual traditions of Russia are also present in modern weddings.

The traditions of wedding ceremonies of the Slavs go back more than one century: our ancestors very closely followed the observance of the rules. Starting a family was a sacred and meaningful activity that took an average of three days. Since that time, wedding omens and superstitions have come down to us, passed down from generation to generation in Russia.

Wedding ceremonies of the ancient Slavs

For our ancestors, the wedding ceremony was an extremely important event: they approached the creation of a new family extremely responsibly, hoping for the help of the Gods and fate. The word “wedding” itself consists of three parts: “sva” is the sky, “d” is the deed on earth and “ba” is blessed by the Gods. It turns out that historically the word "wedding" stands for "earthly deed blessed by the Gods." Ancient wedding ceremonies were based on this knowledge.

Entry into family life is always primarily aimed at the continuation of a healthy and strong family. That is why the ancient Slavs imposed several restrictions and prohibitions on the creation of a new pair:

• the groom's age must be at least 21 years old;
• the bride's age is at least 16 years old;
• the lineage of the groom and the lineage of the bride should not be close by blood.

Contrary to popular belief, both the groom and the bride were rarely given in marriage or married against their will: it was believed that the Gods and life itself help the new couple find each other in a special, harmonious state.

In our time, a lot of attention is also paid to achieving harmony: for example, more and more people are beginning to use special meditations to attract love. Our ancestors considered dance to be the best way to harmoniously merge with the rhythms of mother nature.

On the day of Perun or on the holiday of Ivan Kupala, young people wishing to meet their fate gathered in two round dances: men led a circle "salting" - in the direction of the sun, and girls - "anti-salinity". Thus, both round dances walked with their backs to each other.

At the moment of convergence of the dancing, colliding backs, the guy and the girl were taken out of the round dance: it was believed that they were brought together by the Gods. Subsequently, if the girl and the guy were in love with each other, a bride was arranged, the parents got to know each other, and if everything was in order, the date of the wedding was set.

It was believed that on the day of the wedding, the bride died for her family and its guardian spirits, in order to be reborn in the family of the groom. This change was emphasized.

First of all, the wedding dress spoke of the symbolic death of the bride for a kind: our ancestors adopted a red wedding dress with a white veil instead of the current translucent veil.

Red and white in Russia were the colors of mourning, and a thick veil, which completely covered the bride's face, symbolized her being in the world of the dead. It could be removed only during the wedding feast, when the blessing of the Gods over the young had already been accomplished.

Preparations for the wedding day for both the groom and the bride began the night before: the bride's friends went with her to the bathhouse for ritual ablution. To the accompaniment of bitter songs and tears, the girl was washed with water from three buckets, symbolically indicating her presence between the three worlds: Yavi, Navi and Pravi. The bride herself had to cry as much as possible in order to receive the forgiveness of the spirits of her kind that she was leaving.

On the morning of the wedding day, the groom sent the bride a gift that signified the loyalty of his intentions: a box with a comb, ribbons and sweets. From the moment the gift was received, the bride began to dress up and prepare for the wedding ceremony. While dressing and combing her hair, the girlfriends also sang the saddest songs, and the bride had to cry even more than the day before: it was believed that the more tears shed before the wedding, the less they would be shed during married life.

Meanwhile, the so-called wedding train was going to the groom's house: carts in which the groom himself and his retinue went to fetch the bride with gifts to her friends and parents. The richer the groom's family, the longer the train must be. When all the preparations were completed, the train went to the bride's house to singing and dancing.

Upon arrival, the bride's relatives checked the groom's intentions with questions and comic tasks. This tradition has been preserved in our time, turning into a “ransom” for the bride.

After the groom passed all the checks and got the opportunity to see the bride, the wedding train, along with the young, the retinue and relatives, went to the temple. They always rode on it a long way, covering the bride's face with a thick veil: it was believed that at this time the future wife was half in the world of Navi, and it was impossible for people to see her “completely alive”.

Upon arrival at the temple, the awaiting young sorcerer performed the rite of blessing the union, thereby confirming the harmony in a pair and securing the oath of the young before the Gods. From that moment on, the bride and groom were considered a family.

After the ceremony, all the guests, led by the married couple, went to a feast in honor of the wedding, which could last up to seven days with interruptions. During the meal, the young people received gifts, and also presented their guests with belts, amulet dolls and coins many times.

In addition, within six months of family life, the new family, having evaluated the gift of each guest, had to pay a return visit and present the so-called "gift" - a return gift worth more than the guest's gift. By this, the young family showed that the guest's gift went for the future, increasing their well-being.

Over time, unshakable wedding traditions have undergone some changes caused by migration and wars. The changes took root and brought us the memory of Russian folk wedding ceremonies.

Russian folk wedding ceremonies

With the advent of Christianity in Russia, wedding ceremonies have changed radically. For several decades, the rite of blessing the Gods in the temple turned into a wedding ceremony in the church. People did not immediately accept the new way of life, and this directly affected the holding of such an important event as a wedding.

Since the marriage union was not considered valid without a church wedding, the wedding ceremony consisted of two parts: a church wedding and a ceremonial part, a feast. "Sorcery" was not encouraged by the highest church officials, but for some time the clergy participated in the "unmarried" wedding part.

Just like among the ancient Slavs, in the tradition of the Russian folk wedding, traditional customs have been preserved for a long time: matchmaking, bride and collusion. At the general bridal show, which took place at the festivities, the groom's family looked after the bride, inquiring about her and her family.

Having found a girl of a suitable age and status, the groom's relatives sent matchmakers to the bride's family. Matchmakers could come up to three times: the first - to declare the intentions of the groom's family, the second - to look closely at the bride's family, and the third - to get consent.

In the event of a successful matchmaking, a bride was appointed: the bride's family came to the groom's house and examined the household, concluding whether their daughter would live here well. If everything was in order and in line with their expectations, the bride's parents accepted the invitation to share the meal with the groom's family. In case of refusal, the matchmaking was terminated.

If the stage of the show turned out to be successful, then the groom's parents came with a return visit: they personally met the bride, watched her housekeeping skills and communicated with her. If in the end they were not disappointed in the girl, then the groom was brought to the bride.

The girl had to appear in all her outfits, to show how good she is as a hostess and companion. The groom also had to show his best qualities: on the evening of the “third review”, the bride in most cases had the right to refuse the groom.

If the young people were able to please each other and did not mind the wedding, their parents began to discuss the material costs of the wedding of their children, the size of the bride's dowry and gifts from the groom's family. This part was called "handshake", because, having agreed on everything, the father of the bride and the father of the groom "beat their hands," that is, they sealed the contract with a handshake.

After the completion of the contract, preparations began for the wedding, which could last up to a month.

On her wedding day, the bride's bridesmaids dressed her in a wedding dress to lament about her girlish gay life. The bride had to cry constantly, seeing off her girlhood. Meanwhile, the groom and his friends came to the bride's house, preparing to ransom his future wife from her family and girlfriends.

After a successful ransom and symbolic tests of the groom, the young went to church: the groom and his friends went noisily and singing, and the bride went separately, on a long journey, without attracting special attention to herself. The groom certainly had to come to church first: in this way the future wife avoided the stigma of the "abandoned bride".

During the wedding, the bride and groom were placed on a spread white cloth, strewn with coins and hops. The guests also closely watched the wedding candles: it was believed that whoever held his candle higher would dominate the family.

After the completion of the wedding, the young had to blow out the candles at the same time in order to die on the same day. Extinguished candles were to be kept all their lives, protected from damage and lit for a short time only at the time of the birth of the first child.

After the wedding ceremony, the creation of a family was considered legal, and then a feast followed, at which the ritual actions of the ancient Slavs were largely manifested.

This custom existed for a long time, until it was transformed into modern wedding traditions, which still retained many of the ritual moments of old weddings.

Vintage wedding ceremonies

Many people in our time do not even know about the sacred significance of the familiar moments of any wedding. Instead of an authentic ceremony in a temple or a wedding in a church, which has long been obligatory, now there is a state registration of marriage followed by a banquet. It would seem, what is left of the ancient way of life in this? It turns out a lot.

Russian wedding is an interesting symbiosis of old national traditions, trends of the Soviet era and elements of Western style. Although many couples prefer to celebrate their weddings in a Western manner (onsite registration, replacement of the host by the host, no contests, accordionist, traditional ransom and meeting with bread and salt), most of the spouses adhere to the classical traditions.

Matchmaking

In ancient times, before sending matchmakers to the bride's house, they were carefully selected. As a rule, relatives became matchmakers. The main purpose of a matchmaker is to be an authoritative person in the eyes of others and to know what to say in a given situation. The peculiarities of weddings in Russia consisted in the fact that the bride and her future spouse were not familiar before the wedding, and it was the skill of the matchmakers that depended on whether the wedding would take place at all.

Only by their speeches it was possible to understand how good the groom is in terms of his characteristics and qualities. Matchmaking has always been accompanied by jokes, songs, dances.

As part of the matchmaking, many symbolic rites were performed, some of which are still observed today.

Loaf

This attribute was most often brought by matchmakers from the groom's side. If the girl agreed to the wedding, she cut the loaf into pieces and distributed it to everyone present, starting with the parents. The loaf had to be eaten to the last piece - then the future marriage was considered successful and happy.

Towel

Today, the towel is used in matchmaking as a dish for a loaf. After matchmaking - stored until the solemn day.

There were certain dates and even days when the outcome of the matchmaking could end most successfully. Such dates included the 3rd, 5th, 7th and 9th of each month, as well as October 14th. The last date was especially significant, since it fell on the feast of the Protection of the Most Holy Theotokos. It was impossible to get married on the 13th of any month. Among the days of the week, weekends, Tuesday and Thursday were best suited for matchmaking.

Matchmakers, having entered the house of the future bride, never openly declared the purpose of their visit. They talked to the owners of the house on abstract topics, and then from a distance they came to the point. The bride's parents welcomed the guests, treated them to drinks (they were served by the bride-to-be).

At this time, matchmakers looked closely at the girl, began to inquire about her and praise the groom. If the groom received a refusal, then, as a rule, it was a very laconic answer: “Our apple hasn’t poured yet”, “Our goods are not for sale”, “We haven’t accumulated enough money yet” and others.

If the results of the matchmaking were positive, then after discussing organizational issues, the bride gave her betrothed a pledge - a handkerchief.

A piece of loaf was wrapped in a scarf, and the matchmaker carried it up, so that everyone could see that the matchmaking was successful and the wedding would soon take place.

Today, the decision on the wedding is made by the lovers themselves. Only after that, parents and other relatives will learn about the upcoming event. Of course, matchmaking in many families is carried out to this day (as a certain tribute to ancient traditions, parents). It is during this pre-wedding ceremony that the bride's parents can better see and recognize the groom.

Today matchmaking is carried out in a simplified form. Matchmakers do not arrange dramatized scenes, sing little and do not say jokes. The groom, entering the bride's house, presents flowers to all the women present. Matchmakers bring fruits, alcoholic drinks, sweets. The bride receives a valuable gift from the groom and future father-in-law and mother-in-law.

Most often it is a piece of jewelry, but it can also be an old heirloom. The bride's parents are presented with an inexpensive gift, but with meaning: a horseshoe (a talisman for housing), a beautiful candle (for comfort and warmth in the house), a photo album (for good memories) and others. As soon as there was an exchange of gifts and mutual greetings, all those present are invited to the table, where the details of the future wedding are discussed.

To prevent matchmaking from turning into a boring evening, you need to choose the right matchmakers. The most suitable option is talkative natures who are not burdened with shyness, complexes that can captivate everyone with them.

The groom who comes with the matchmakers must remain silent. It is matchmakers who should shine with eloquence. Having greeted all those present and informed about the purpose of the visit, matchmakers can come up with a whole kaleidoscope of comic tests and tricky questions for the bride. The same tasks, carefully prepared by the bride's relatives, await the groom.

In the midst of matchmaking with typical jokes, the moment of the marriage proposal stands apart. At this moment, both the groom and the bride's parents should be very serious, but sincere. The groom can ask the parents to marry his daughter to him at the very beginning of the meeting or at the table.

After the engagement was announced to everyone, the main wedding chores began. The bride, along with household chores, had to prepare a dowry for herself and sew a wedding dress. In remote villages, there was even a custom to go out every day on the porch of the father’s house, sob and lament about the fear of entering a new life. Nowadays, such a ritual is no longer observed.

In addition, a bachelorette party was held on the eve of the wedding. Today in Russia a bachelorette party is celebrated very magnificently and loudly, but in the old days it was a rather quiet evening with sad songs.

Bridesmaids braided her braids, weaving satin ribbons, then unraveling.

It was believed that in this way the bride says goodbye to her former unmarried life. The bride herself cried and lamented. The ribbons from the bride's braid were considered endowed with meaning: the bridesmaids took them apart and kept them for happiness and early marriage.

The groom's pre-wedding preparation consisted of baking a huge painted loaf, decorated with flowers, figurines and interesting patterns made of dough. The entire female half of the house was engaged in the creation of this culinary masterpiece until dawn, accompanied by loaf songs. The groom had a bachelor party on the eve of the wedding. His family and friends were present at this evening.

Ransom of the bride

In Russia, the ransom of the bride was a very responsible matter, requiring considerable generosity from the groom. Today the monetary component has already receded into the background. The main purpose of the ransom these days: passing all the tests-contests prepared by the bridesmaids, the groom proves to everyone how well he knows and loves his future wife. Friends from the groom's side can always come to his aid, if necessary.

After the ransom is completed, the bride's parents will arrange a small table for those present.

Wedding ceremony

The wedding takes on a new hue after the official ceremony at the registry office. Many modern couples delight themselves and guests in the hall for official ceremonies not only with the first kiss, but also with the first dance (you must first agree on a specific composition).

After the official part, the guests will have a photo session with the young. Then the guests of the holiday should stand on both sides of the exit from the registry office in order to shower the young with rose petals, rice, coins or sweets.

According to popular beliefs, this ceremony (depending on the products chosen) bestows wealth, healthy offspring, and a romantic and sweet life together for the young. If the newlyweds are true believers, then according to the customs of the Russian people, on the same day they undergo a wedding ceremony.

After the official events, the festivities begin. Usually only the closest friends are involved.

In order to keep colorful photographs as a keepsake, young people visit and hold a photo session in the most picturesque corners of the city.

The groom carrying the bride across the bridge is also an integral tradition in Russian weddings. According to legends, the young must do a similar procedure on seven bridges, then their union will be strong. But in the conditions of modern celebrations and the congestion of the main city highways, it is not always possible to do this, therefore the tradition is respected, but the number of objects is reduced to one. A memorial castle with the initials of the young is also left there as a symbol of the strength of marriage.

In Russia, the newlyweds, after the wedding, visited the father's house of the groom. The mother-in-law greeted them with bread and salt (loaf), and the father-in-law at that time was holding the icons. The bride and groom had to bite off part of the loaf. The head of the family was determined by the size of the bite off. At the same time, the ceremony of blessing the new family took place. Today, a meeting with a loaf is increasingly taking place in the banquet hall in the presence of guests.

Outfits

The first thing at a wedding is always paid attention to the bride's dress. Its color is, in most cases, white. The bride acquires a new dress, although some girls prefer to wear their mother's dress on this solemn day, wishing to inherit her happy family life. A new dress is a symbol of entering a new life, and white is a symbol of youth and purity. That is why women who get married several times wear blue or beige outfits for subsequent ceremonies.

If in Russia a wedding dress has always been a bright red color, then at modern celebrations you can see brides in white attire with bright accents or delicate trim in pastel colors.

Red color today is the lot of courageous and extraordinary personalities. Veils have become optional in modern weddings. It is perceived as an adornment of the hairstyle. You can replace the veil with a veiled hat.

According to popular beliefs, there must be something old in the dress of the bride. Most often it is family jewelry or an element from the mother's wedding dress. This attribute is a symbol of the relationship between generations. Also, the outfit should contain a detail borrowed from a girlfriend. It is believed that then there will always be true friends next to the young, ready to help in difficult times.

In order for harmony to reign in a young family, the bride should be wearing something blue: a garter, an accessory, an element of a dress, a makeup component.

Feast

The wedding script is built in such a way that congratulations take the main place in it. Parents are always invited to do this first. Then the floor is given to relatives and friends. So that the money envelopes do not form a messy heap, and by the end of the evening they are not lost at all, the bride herself or her bridesmaids specially make a box with a slot. A witness helps the bride to collect gifts in cash on the day of the celebration.

After the first toasts and snacks, guests are invited to the dance floor. According to tradition, the first dance always remains with the young (if it was not in the registry office). It is very fashionable today to do staged dances, for which the bride and groom have been diligently engaged in a dance studio for several months. For a spectacular performance, the bride and groom can temporarily wear other outfits.

Another traditional dance during the feast is the dance of the bride with her father. By this action, he blesses his daughter for a happy life in another family.

Old Russian weddings, of course, differed from modern ones, they had a special meaning. The union of two people into a family was accompanied by various rituals that were intended to make family life happy. Russian wedding traditions were strictly observed. Each stage of the celebration included a number of events that followed their own scenario.

The bride is the first step to marriage

Preparations for future marriage always began with Smotrin. The parents chose the bride or groom, so they tried to find the most suitable match for their child. Here, physical data was taken into account most of all. It is important that future spouses have good health, which determines the ability to feed the family and worthily preserve their family hearth. The girl had to be hardworking and strong in spirit. Little attention was paid to welfare. It was believed that the young would make their own wealth.

The parents of the newlyweds found a suitable match. And if the girl and the guy approved of this choice, then preparations began for the next action. But, of course, the opinion of the girl was rarely taken into account, often she was married off without consent. In small villages, where all people knew each other, the bride could not be held.

Before starting the matchmaking process, a family council was arranged in the house, where all members of the family expressed their pros and cons. The bride and groom did not participate in this council, they were notified after that. Quite often, the young were informed about the upcoming wedding only the day before, and they might not have seen each other at all before.

Matchmaking is the rapprochement of future relatives

Representatives of two family members had to get to know each other, since family ties were of great importance. The groom's parents went to the bride's house. People who were talkative and wealthy were chosen as representatives in order to present their family in a favorable light. Arriving at the house, the matchmakers baptized themselves on icons and asked permission to sit on a chair.

The bride's parents laid the table with all sorts of treats and invited matchmakers to the table as required by Russian wedding traditions and customs. It was believed that the matchmakers should be well fed, as this would bring good luck to the house, even if the groom did not really like it. And only at the end of the dinner did they say that “the goods were not ripe for them yet” and the bride was not ready for the future wedding. They could also ask to wait if they did not know the groom at all. Parents said that giving a bride in marriage was not as quick as baking a pie. After all, raising a child is a long process and it is quite difficult to get married right away.

The matchmaking was to take place by candlelight, after dusk, so that all family members were at home. It was possible to woo only on certain days - Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, since they were considered the easiest. The bride had to go out to the matchmakers and present them with some kind of treat, and the groom had to bring a ring. During the matchmaking, the future life of the newlyweds was not discussed, for this there was another rite.

Collusion - there is no turning back

The parents of the bride and groom gathered again to discuss all the material and household issues of the future celebration and the life of the young. They had to discuss everything. And if everything ended positively, then the parents feasted and drank a glass of vodka in honor of a successful conspiracy.

During the conspiracy, they also talked about the bride's dowry; in wealthy families, this agreement was sealed with a signature on paper. After all the issues were discussed, the fathers beat each other on the hands. This rite was called mating. Then the bride and groom joined hands - thus, showing that an alliance was concluded between them. After the conspiracy, it was impossible to refuse the upcoming wedding under any pretext. Refusal meant a mortal sin and the one who refused had to pay compensation to the other party. After breaking the collusion, it was necessary to wear mourning clothes.

After this ceremony, the bride was not supposed to do household work until the wedding itself. She had to walk around the village and lament. It was believed that the more she lamented, the happier her family life would be. The groom, on the other hand, before the wedding, had to walk merrily with friends in order to say goodbye to his brave life. Every evening he was supposed to give his future wife and her friends some kind of treat.

Bachelorette and bachelor parties

The bride's bachelorette party lasted until the wedding day. She and her friends sang sad songs somewhere on a bench near the house. Girlfriends braided her braid, weaving flowers into her, decorated her head with wreaths. Then the braid unraveled. The braid was considered a symbol of girlhood, and when she unraveled, it meant that the bride was ready to become a wife. Before the wedding, the bride and her friends went to the bathhouse to say goodbye to her old life. But first, she needed to wear a wreath of flowers, which her friends woven for her.

In the bathhouse, her friends helped the bride to wash, she had to soar for a long time with a birch broom. It was believed that the bridesmaid who steamed with this broom after the bride would also soon get married. Before the wedding, the groom had to gather a feast in his house, where relatives and friends came.

Blessing is the Path to Happiness in Marriage

Wedding traditions in Russia have always included the blessing of their parents; without it, young people could not get married. They had to get their parents' consent for the marriage. The blessing ceremony was held in the church, the bride's parents held bread, salt with a towel in their hands. It was believed that without this, young people could not be happily married.

For blessing, special bread with patterns was baked. Great importance was attached to its preparation. Such bread could only be prepared by a happily married, fertile woman to convey her happy marriage experience. Before kneading the dough, she washed, put on a clean dress and prayerfully got down to business.

Her husband put the bread in the oven, also with prayer. The bride and groom were always greeted with such a loaf, they had to bite off first, and then the bread was handed out to the guests in pieces. The couple were greeted with words of congratulations, which the most respected person in the family was supposed to say.

Decorating the newlyweds

The bride always observed Russian wedding ceremonies, which required her to get up early in the morning and put on a mourning dress. This meant that her girlhood was over. The girlfriends were supposed to braid her braid one last time. Then the bride changed into festive clothes. The bride's dress of those times consisted of a sundress and a shirt, which could be white, but most often red. The sundress on this occasion was embroidered with gold threads and decorated with furs and jewelry. Wedding dresses were often inherited from mother to daughter. They were carefully kept all their life. Under the sundress, petticoats were worn to add splendor to the outfit.

A wreath was put on the head and the hair was left loose, while they could be adorned with jewelry. After the wedding, the hair was braided and the braids were wrapped around the head. After that, the woman had to put on the kokoshnik or the bride's headscarf. The shirt of the bride and groom must have had long arms so that they did not touch each other before the wedding. The groom wore a hat where a flower was attached. Clothes were belted with a towel. The bride began to wear a white dress with a veil only in the 19th century.

Wedding train or tests for the groom

Before the start of the celebration, Russian wedding customs demanded that the groom ransom the bride. This is an ancient rite that was followed unswervingly. The groom and several of his friends went to the bride's house. On the way to his future wife, he was blocked in every possible way. The groom and his friends had to jump over the bridge, go through the fire and show their courage.

His bridesmaids would not let him into the house, asking him for money or demanding to guess a riddle. The young man also had to pay off his girlfriends with sweets, gingerbread, money. There was a belief that the more obstacles the groom will have on the way to the bride's house, the stronger their union will be. When the groom nevertheless broke through to his beloved, he put a ring on her and kissed her. They were showered with grain and hops. It was believed that this way the marriage would be happy. The table was laid for friends, but the bride and groom did not eat, since before the wedding it was necessary to cleanse themselves of everything earthly.

Wedding as an important stage in marriage

After the trial of the groom, the newlyweds had to go to church to get married. They rode in different carts. The carts were decorated with bells and bells to announce that they were on their way to church for the wedding. The horses had to be well cleaned, and the sleds had to be covered with soft pillows and carpets.

The wedding in those days had legal force, so the ceremony was recorded in the priest's book. The ceremony was accompanied by the reading of prayers. Crowns were to be held over the bride and groom throughout the ceremony. The priest gave instructions to the young about their future married life. Parents were usually not present at the wedding; they had to stay at home to prepare holiday dishes and set the tables.

The bride and groom took witnesses with them, who were required to be the spiritual mentors of their marriage. During the ceremony, they helped the priest, served various things and held crowns on the heads of the young couple.

Princely table of newlyweds

And after the wedding ceremony, the wedding train went to the wedding feast - the princely table, which was held in the house of the groom's parents. The bride and groom were seated in the front corner of the house, next to them - the next of kin. The tables were arranged in the shape of the letter "L". The groom was called a young prince, and the bride was a young princess.

Any acquaintances of the bride and groom could attend the wedding feast. A variety of foods and drinks were served, it was impossible to serve an odd number of dishes for a wedding feast. The tables were covered with white tablecloths. The bride and groom again should not eat anything from what is on the festive table. They were served dinner at the end of the wedding feast in a special room.

After they had eaten there, the second part called "the table of the mountains" began. At this time, it was customary to give gifts. Everyone gave them something - it could be gingerbread or money. After the end of the feast, the young went off to the cheerful songs of the guests to spend their wedding night.

Wedding night

The newlyweds spent their first night in the groom's house. They were laid on a bed in a cold room, for example, a closet, and sometimes even in a sheepfold. The bride had to bring from her dowry a beautiful, ironed sheet and blanket. On the place where the young people will sleep, they put a feather bed.

The process of making the marriage bed of love was a special ceremony. It was necessary to put a poker, sacks of flour and logs under it. Sacks of flour meant wealth, and logs meant future children. It is important that there is a branch of mountain ash or juniper in the room, which is stuck into the wall in order to protect the young from unclean spirits.

Outside, the young were guarded by the groom's friends so that they would not be disturbed by drunken guests. The bride had to take off the boots from the groom, which showed her humility, and the groom asked if it was possible to go to bed with her.

In the morning, guests knocked on the young people to check whether the bride was innocent. And if not, then a heavy collar was put on the parents' necks. In those ancient times, it was believed that a girl could lose her virginity only after performing the rituals and becoming a wife.

Bread - the final stage of rituals

On the second day of the wedding, the completion of the rituals took place. At the bride's house, a feast was again held. The mother-in-law for the son-in-law had to cook pancakes, scrambled eggs and treat him. If the son-in-law ate what she prepared, then the bride was innocent, and if she refused, then no. Thus, he showed the parent's claim that they did not look after their daughter.

Modern weddings differ significantly from the old ones, but many couples would like to observe some Russian wedding traditions. After all, many of them harbor the wisdom of our ancestors and make the wedding celebration beautiful and sincere.

Wedding traditions and customs of the Russian people go back to very deep roots. Since historical times, people have respected all the rules, the founders of which were the ancestors of the Russian people, and adhered to them.

Thanks to this, many of them have survived to the present day. But not many newlyweds and even their parents know their essence. Despite this, it is the old traditional events that make the wedding celebration touching, original and unforgettable. More details about them will be discussed later.

Russian Svalba is a whole list of different rules, taking into account all kinds of signs for the bride and groom: these are numerous wedding ceremonies, and the second day of the event organized by the groom's parents, and many other nuances. Moreover, in ancient times, all of them were strictly observed.

Matchmaking

Before reaching directly to the wedding, in ancient times it was necessary to go through many more traditional actions. It was impossible to imagine that young people would get married without a preliminary matchmaking procedure.

At first, the young man sent matchmakers to the girl, who conspired with the bride's parents and resolved various issues related to marriage. Today this tradition is known, but almost never observed. Is that in a comic form.

And all the main points about the date of the celebration and other little things, the newlyweds decide on their own. In ancient times, the groom could not come to matchmaking with anything - an engagement ring had to be prepared. Often, parents conspired in advance about matchmaking and pairing children.

But according to custom, it was believed that the wedding would take place only if the girl accepted the ring from the young man.

If a guy came without a ring, then his parents concluded that he would not be able to provide for his family in the future.

If the matchmaking ended with a positive decision, then the parents had to perform the rite of blessing. In ancient times, it was carried out only in the temple using icons, a towel and bread and salt.

In the event that the young people conspired among themselves about the wedding, and their parents did not like their choice, then they could not receive the blessing of the latter. The young had to obey.

Otherwise, there was a risk of complete rupture of relations with parents for disobedience.

Engagement

After the matchmaking was over, the next step was conspiracy, or, in other words, "arm-wrestling". During this event, all participants in the event discussed all aspects of preparing and holding the wedding.

It was from that day that all joint actions began, and it began to be called the engagement. The engagement was considered an important day in the development of relationships between young people. From this point on, some obligations were determined. On this day, in public, a young man made marriage proposals to the girl.

But first of all he turned to the father of the bride. And only after his approval, the groom could turn directly to his chosen one. After an affirmative answer, the guy handed her a ring, which was worn on the ring finger of her right hand until the wedding. The engagement was celebrated quite solemnly. All worries relied mainly on the bride's family.

A chic table was laid, the heroes of the occasion and all the guests put on smart clothes. It was the bride's father who sat in the center of the feast.

He always retained the right of the first word and parting words. Then the guests one by one approached the young people and pronounced congratulations.

In village families, the engagement gradually developed into a noisy event with songs and dances. Balls were traditionally organized among wealthy people on this day, to which a huge number of guests were invited.

In ancient times, the engagement took place at least 3-6 months before the wedding. In this way, the young were given time to think over their decision and check their feelings. Another reason for such a long period was the allocation of the necessary period of time for organizing the wedding and carrying out preparatory events.

For some time, the tradition of the engagement has been forgotten, but recently some newlyweds are increasingly turning to this moment.

Wedding preparations

So, the engagement has passed, the date of the wedding has been set, and therefore the time has come to prepare for the wedding.

Dowry

After the conspiracy and engagement, the bride began to prepare the dowry. Basically, the girl did this on her own, but if the deadlines were tight, then all the women in the house came to the rescue: mother, sisters, bridesmaids. The composition of the dowry differed depending on the well-being of families and their status.

The list of dowries usually included several dresses, fur coats, dishes, bed linen, blankets and bedspreads, carpets, fur coats, and so on. In addition to her dowry, the girl had to prepare wedding attributes:

• embroidered towel used for blessing;
• embroidered shirt for the groom, which he wore at the wedding.

After the wedding celebration, the embroidered towel was preserved in the new family and was a talisman against sorrows and bad weather.

Outfit

The bride's wedding dress was significantly different from that which is customary to see at modern celebrations. White wedding dress came to Russia from Europe.

And in ancient times, the bride wore a red sundress, symbolizing a happy marriage and large offspring. And the white color was attributed to misfortune and sadness.

Now about the veil. This element of a wedding dress had the right to be worn by a girl who was getting married for the first time. Such a bride had to keep her veil on during the entire wedding. Veil is a symbol of innocence. In many cases, it was replaced by a translucent shawl.

The shawl was a protection for the bride from evil spirits who could not see it under her. She had to leave her parental home in it and not take it off until the wedding ceremony.

Wedding rings

The tradition of wearing wedding rings also appeared a long time ago. And there were certain requirements for them.

The main one was that their surface should be absolutely smooth. The presence of a stone is encouraged in the engagement ring, preferably a diamond. In the engagement attributes there should be no pattern or stones.

It was believed that all these moments will attract misfortunes, troubles and other unpleasant moments in family life.

Groom's worries

The groom also had concerns. He prepared in his own way for the wedding celebration. Of course, not as many worries were imposed on the young man as on the newlywed. His main task was to organize a wedding bouquet for his chosen one.

At the present time, you can easily use the services of florists, and earlier the front gardens of relatives and neighbors came to the rescue. It should be noted that none of them could refuse the request to the groom.

By tradition, on the wedding day, the guy presented a bouquet to the bride, and she had to choose the most beautiful flower and attach it to the groom's shirt. This moment is the prototype for bridal boutonnieres in modern times. Today it is prepared in advance and is often not made from fresh flowers. The young man had to think about the wedding procession. Previously, it had the name “solemn wedding train”. All relatives and guests from the groom's side took part in it.

His parents were the exception. They should have stayed in the house and finished all preparations for the holiday.

Bachelorette and bachelor parties

Two more events took place just three days before the wedding. The brides organized a bachelorette party, and the groom organized a bachelor party.

At the present time, the bachelorette party is held in the form of a fun party at which the girlfriends give the bride all sorts of trinkets. In ancient times, everything happened differently. The newly made bride gathered all the girls of the village, girlfriends and relatives.

A vytnitsa, who sang suffering songs, was invariably invited. The girl at this time cried bitterly, saying goodbye to her youth, carefree life, and her parental home.

The sobbing of the bride at the bachelorette party was mandatory - otherwise, she would face an unhappy life in marriage.

After the ceremony of sobbing, all those present were invited to the table. Everyone drank and ate and continued to cry. The bride gave each guest two belts. The event ended with songs.

If the girl was allowed to leave the house, then in the summertime they walked in a crowd into the field, collected flowers, knitted wreaths. All these actions were accompanied by songs. In the winter, we went for a sleigh ride. At the end of the bachelorette party, the bride and her friends went to the bathhouse, where she was washed and prepared for the upcoming wedding.

The groom's bachelor party was the absolute opposite: he spent it all alone, had to be in the bath from evening until morning and be silent.

Celebration

Finally, the day of celebration came, and on this day it was necessary to observe every action exactly. It all started with the sunrise. The newly-made bride needed to read spells from all kinds of evil eye in the house of her future husband.

Ransom of the bride

The next tradition, which has survived to this day, is the ransom of the newlywed.

At the moment when the young man came for his betrothed, he was prepared for various kinds of tests. Only after all the tasks were completed, he could take the bride. The whole process was fun.

The participants were all relatives from the side of the bride, who were blocking the path of the groom at the entrance to the village. The next stage was at the gate of the courtyard. If a young man could not cope with the task, then he had to pay in money. Of course, the task was not to ruin the groom. Everything was symbolic. Moreover, at all stages it was allowed to help the groom's friend.

After the groom took the bride, everyone went together to the wedding in the temple.

Celebration

After church, the newlyweds went to the groom's house, where the festivities took place.

On the threshold of the house, the newlyweds were met by the mother of the newlyweds. She showered the couple with wheat and oats so that there was prosperity and prosperity in family life. Then they were treated to bread and salt.

Loaf or bread was baked at home. Parents were directly involved in this. Previously, there was a tradition of divination by a broken piece of bread. It has survived to the present day. In general, a lot of fortune-telling was done at the wedding celebration.

In particular, on who will be born first, a boy or a girl, or how the young will manage their budget.

Present

One of the pleasant traditions at a wedding is giving presents to the young. In those days, it was customary to give the following gifts:

• rich white towels decorated with fringes;
• a whip to the spouse so that the wife knows her place;
• all kinds of kitchen utensils;
• dishes and souvenirs from porcelain and crystal.

In the past, it was customary to give gifts not only to newlyweds, but also to their parents. The festive wedding table spoke directly about the status of the groom. If he was from a wealthy family, then the table was gorgeous. It was sure to have meat dishes, fresh food, wines of different varieties, different pickles.

A spouse from a poor family set the table more modestly.

The wedding night

The celebration ended with the farewell of the young to rest. The location of the wedding night was kept secret.

It could be a hayloft, a bathhouse, or even a barn. This was done so that the sleeping place of the newlyweds could not be jinxed by unkind people.

The bed was prepared by a person who did not envy the bride and mentally wished her well and happiness. That is why the mother of the bride was doing this. It should be noted that the echoes of the tradition of not spending the night at home on the wedding night have reached the present day.

Many newlyweds try to spend their wedding night in a hotel, on a yacht or in another suitable place.

After the wedding

After the wedding night, the newlyweds performed the following ritual: they brought the newlywed into the house in their arms. In this way, he tried to deceive the brownie - this is not a stranger, but the mistress of the house.

During the wedding, the young people took an oath of eternal love and fidelity. According to tradition, it was during the wedding that their first kiss took place. And then, throughout life, hand in hand, there was strong love and deep respect for each other.

After a while, knowledgeable people assessed whether everything was done correctly during the wedding ritual. If the young family lived happily and in abundance, then there were no violations. The dress, in which the young wife was at the wedding, she kept in her trunk and fished it out only to pass it on to her heiress when the time came. But this was not a panacea.

The girl could prepare a completely new wedding dress and not wear her mother's.

As you can see, the ancestors had quite interesting customs and traditions, many of which have survived to this day, although somewhat in a distorted form. Of course, the goal is not to oblige the newlyweds to strictly follow the traditions that were like the law for great-grandmothers and great-grandfathers. But you need to remember them in order to preserve the history and customs of your people.

This video shows how a wedding was held in Russia with the rites and traditions of the Russian people:

But if there is a desire to apply this or that custom, then it is necessary to thoroughly study it so that any incident does not turn out.

At the present time, newlyweds are trying to hold their wedding using any theme, while completely forgetting the traditions of their people and omitting the traditional component of this event. I would like everything in the life of each of the young to happen exactly the opposite. After all, who, if not young, should preserve the culture and traditions of their people? Or do you consider the inherited from ancestors order of holding a wedding with traditions and customs outdated and unacceptable at a modern celebration?